DEEP INSIDE

I have always wondered how it is that dreams work. How it comes that every human mind has this extraordinary potential to make us almost experience this immensely exciting nonsensical nightly life which becomes so real at times and shows us the completely subjective and unique inner world of the subconscious.

However, when I watched this film called “Inception” last week, rather than paying attention to this entire dreaming idea, which is a kind of “protagonist” in the film, I asked to myself, “is there nothing private anymore?” It’s like if we could even imagine somebody going into our heads and entering our dreams, which literally happens in the film over and over again. So isn’t this movie showing us something else?

The fact is that this does not happen in dreams only but our subconscious is being permanently reached when are wide awake. I think there are no more aspects of our mind that remain private and individual anymore. But we are powerfully influenced by the media and the internet and EVERYTHING and EVERYONE “out there.”

We are educated with our families’ value, that’s for sure. But we cannot deny the influence that TV programmes and advertisements have in our minds, permanently sending messages addressed to our vulnerable subconscious. This way we are persuaded, or let me say rather manipulated, to feel, think and behave in one only particular “socially accepted” way. And we are convinced there is only one way to live this life: consumerism, superficiality, lack of values, shallowness.

Marketing messages seem sophisticated, inspiring, meaningful, and memorable. They show us a world of dreams, constantly suggesting what we “should” in order to be part of it. And our vulnerable subconscious gets that messages and obeys instantly. They are building up a robotic society, ready to respond, ready to obey, ready to consume, whether you like it or not. But does this sound like a dream? I believe this is a nightmare instead.

An Unlikely STAR

The moment she appeared as a contestant on reality TV programme Britain’s Got talent with her plain appearance, it wasn’t her who was ‘the ugly’ so much as people’s reactions to her. When she first appeared on Britain’s Got Talent she said her ambition was to become a professional singer; it was only raised eyebrows and stifled laughter what she got from the audience, then. The judges’ expression revealed mistrust, and even disdain, and the viewers were bitterly hostile to this rather chubby woman the moment she took the stage. Apparently, nobody was expecting her performance to turn her into an overnight global phenomenon.

Susan Boyle is a 47-year-old Scottish amateur singer who has recently come into international public attention. What was it that made her a public figure in the blink of an eye? I believe it was the contrast between the ‘ugly’ first impressions she gave and her lovely powerful voice. Then, cynicism turned into whooping and broad smiles. She finished to a standing ovation at her spine-tingling performance. Susan Boyle sang ‘I dreamed a dream’ from ‘Les Miserables’ in the first round of the third series of Britain’s Got Talent revealing her unexpected exceptional talent. And this was only the beginning.

In just a week her life had been turned upside down. By now, videos of Susan Boyle have been watched all around the world and she has proved more popular than any other character on You Tube. Her audition video has been viewed on the internet several hundred million times and she even has her own fans. Isn’t it amazing that just some months or so ago no one had heard of Susan Boyle? Well, now she has became one of the most talked-about people in the world. It is a dream come true.

"Men are from Venus, Women are from Mars"

“Men are from Venus, women are from Mars.” That is the title of a book written by John Gray which basically offers various suggestions aiming at improving men-women relationships in couples. However, I have recently realized how hard it becomes to try to understand people from another gender, let alone improve any relationship with them. Last month I watched this video which made me laugh a lot but at the same time reflect on the differences in personalities, attitudes, and behaviours of men and women, which have proven troublesome in any relationship, and which are an intrinsic part of them all. But, if it’s of any consolation to you, and me as well, let me share with you what I’ve learned in this video: we are different in nature, and nothing can change that.

One of the ideas that the mentioned video introduces in order to explain these natural differences between the two sexes is the one I am trying to express in my comic strip, and which Pilar Sordo, the psychologist in the video, called “magical thinking.” This is a thought structure, mainly developed in women’s minds, which lead people, more precisely women, to continuously compare the objective reality with their mental reality, the subjective images they create of people and things. Let me give you an example. We women are permanently expecting our boyfriends to be romantic with us and send us flowers daily. And it makes us so mad to realize that that will never ever happen, IN REALITY. What actually is making us so angry is in fact this so-called magical thinking, or magical thought, which is making us permanently compare the real man, our boyfriends, with this image we have in our minds of ‘the perfect man’. Of course we know who will lose the battle. And there it comes, the moment when we become intolerant, reproachful, and extremely unhappy as well.

It sounds complex. It must be complex. But learning to cope with the unlimited number of differences with the other gender is essential in order to improve all relationships. We can't deny we sometimes feel like crazy when not being able to control certain of our own emotions and reactions. And it frustrates us not being able to understand some of their behaviours. It is not a matter of just blindly and passively accepting each other, but of becoming more open-minded, learning about the other, understanding why it is that they, and we, behave in the way we do. And in the end, understanding and acceptance might lead us to complete happiness. How do you see it?